English Listening Practice: Second Chances in Love & Divorce
Did you know that nearly half of all marriages in the West end in divorce? Ouch! This is a startling statistic and reflects how common divorce is in Western countries like the UK. Understanding this reality will help you navigate discussions about relationships, making your British English skills even more relevant and practical.
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✔️ Lesson transcript: https://adeptenglish.com/lessons/english-listening-practice-divorce-regret-relationships-english-vocabulary/
Today's lesson will take an interesting look at relationships in the UK with lots of examples to help you learn words like 'divorce,' 'reconcile,' and 'regret', words you'll hear in everyday English conversations. You’ll not only expand your English vocabulary around relationships, but also discover why people want to reconcile after breaking up.
Near the end of the lesson I share a powerful tip to help you use this new English vocabulary fluently, giving you the confidence to talk about relationships in any context!
Marriage is not just spiritual communion; it is also remembering to take out the trash.
⭐ Joyce Brothers
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More About This Lesson
In this British English lesson, you will learn new English words like "divorce" and "reconcile." These words are important when talking about love, regret, and relationships in Western culture.
Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides.
⭐ Louis de Bernières
Start listening & you'll:
- Expand your vocabulary with useful words like "divorce," "reconcile," and "regret."
- Learn to speak about relationships confidently in everyday English.
- Hear real-life examples that help you understand cultural perspectives on marriage.
- Improve your listening skills through clear, conversational language.
- Gain insight into common idiomatic phrases like "staying power" and "soaring."
- Understand English grammar through regular listening without formal study.
- Learn pronunciation and spelling by hearing key words repeated.
- Practice fluency while discussing a topic relevant to modern life.
This lesson helps you understand how to talk about relationships in English. You will learn words that many people use in everyday conversations. By exploring these topics, you will expand your vocabulary and feel more confident when discussing emotions like love and regret.
- Help us make more content with a donation https://adeptengli.sh/donate
Engaging with this lesson is a great way to improve your English. Many people feel unsure when discussing personal topics like love and relationships. This lesson gives you the words and phrases you need to express your feelings clearly. Understanding these subjects is also important in British culture, making your conversations richer and more interesting.
Happily ever after is not a fairy tale. It's a choice.
⭐ Fawn Weaver
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Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ)
- How can listening to podcasts help improve your English fluency? Listening to English language podcasts like this one can significantly boost your English fluency. Regularly exposing yourself to native speakers discussing various topics, you'll improve your listening comprehension, expand your vocabulary, and internalize natural speech patterns. This podcast focuses on relationships and divorce, giving you practice with everyday English conversation on these subjects. Remember, consistent listening is key - try to make it a daily habit!
- What are some key vocabulary words related to relationships and divorce in British English? This podcast introduces several important terms related to relationships and divorce in British English. You'll encounter words like "divorce," "reconcile," "regret," and phrases such as "to break up" and "to get back together." Pay attention to how these words are used in context. Try to use them in your own sentences to reinforce your learning. Don't be afraid to make mistakes - they're a natural part of the language learning process!
- How does the podcast discuss cultural differences in marriage and divorce? The podcast touches on cultural differences in marriage and divorce, comparing Western practices with those in cultures where arranged marriages are common. It mentions how some cultures have mechanisms to support young couples in developing good relationship skills. This comparison helps you understand diverse perspectives on relationships, which is valuable for improving your cultural awareness alongside your language skills. Try discussing these differences with language exchange partners to practice using this vocabulary in conversation.
- What tips does the podcast offer for improving your English listening skills? The podcast emphasizes the importance of listening multiple times to really anchor new words and phrases in your mind. It also mentions that you're unconsciously learning English grammar with each listen. To maximize your learning, try active listening techniques: focus intently on the audio, repeat phrases aloud, and write down new vocabulary. Don't worry if you don't understand everything at first - comprehension will improve with repeated exposure.
- How can you apply the relationship vocabulary from this podcast in real-life conversations? To apply the relationship vocabulary you've learned, try incorporating these words and phrases into your daily English practice. You could discuss relationships with language exchange partners, write short stories or dialogues using the new terms, or even role-play relationship scenarios. Remember, the goal is to make these words a natural part of your English vocabulary. Don't be shy about using them - practice makes perfect!
Most Unusual Words:
- Divorce: When a married couple legally ends their marriage.
- Reconcile: To get back together after separating or having problems.
- Regret: Feeling sorry about something you have done.
- Soar: To rise or increase quickly to a high level.
- Afflicted: Suffering from a problem or difficulty.
- Negotiate: To discuss and come to an agreement.
- Impulse: A sudden desire to do something without thinking.
- Empathy: The ability to understand and share the feelings of others.
- Pave the way: To make something easier to happen in the future.
- Chemistry: A special feeling of attraction between two people.
Most Frequently Used Words:
| Word | Count |
|---|---|
| People | 18 |
| Divorce | 16 |
| Couples | 12 |
| Relationships | 11 |
| Interesting | 9 |
| Often | 9 |
| Sometimes | 9 |
| Relationship | 8 |
| Married | 8 |
Listen To The Audio Lesson Now
Transcript: Your Relationship Roller Coaster-English Listening
Ever wondered why people divorce, then get back together? Let's dive into this curious trend!
Hi there and welcome to this podcast. Today an interesting topic for you to practise your English skills on. Do you know people who've been in a relationship and they've broken up and got back together again? There was an article in a UK newspaper this week in The Guardian with the title "Will You Marry Me (Again)? The Rise of Divorce Regret". So this newspaper article was talking about the number of people who get divorced in the UK. That's the verb 'to divorce', D-I-V-O-R-C-E, meaning when married couples separate. 'Divorce regret' may mean that people get back together again and they marry a second time. Apparently this is on the rise. So let's learn some vocabulary around relationships today. Words like 'divorce', 'reconcile' and 'regret', which will help you speak confidently in everyday English conversation. So stay tuned to enrich your vocabulary. But also, if you have married someone, regretted it and married them a second time - why on earth would you do that? If you come from a country or a culture where divorce is not common or where it's useful[usual] for your family to influence your choice of partner, this may be an interesting and different perspective for you. And if you live within a culture where divorce is an option and commonplace, it's interesting to think about why would someone marry a partner a second time? As a psychotherapist, I often think there's nothing as fascinating as people and their relationships. And I do sometimes work with couples and I work a lot with individual people on their relationship difficulties. So maybe I can help shed some light on this topic. There's also so much useful vocabulary to learn. Don't forget to listen a number of times and stay with me until the end to discover why 10 to percent of couples who divorce get back together. Something you probably didn't expect. And some thoughts on the positives of arranged marriages too. Going to be an interesting one!
Hello, I’m Hilary, and you’re listening to Adept English. We will help you to speak English fluently. All you have to do is listen. So start listening now and find out how it works.
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Did you know some couples remarry after divorce? Why would anyone try it a second time?
Our topic today, 'What if divorce isn't always the end of a relationship?' You might be surprised to hear how many couples reconcile. That's R-E-C-O-N-C-I-L-E. 'To reconcile' means 'to get back together'. Western countries are well known for their soaring divorce rates. 'Soaring' means 'they soar', S-O-A-R. And 'to soar' means 'to fly high'. One alarming statistic, which is often quoted for the UK - nearly half of marriages end in divorce. We're told in the Guardian article, 'The average adult may have five relationships and fall in love three times.' That's unlucky in love for two of them then. That's an interesting average and sounds realistic for those of us who have choice whom we date and what relationships we choose. We're also told that the divorce rate of nearly 50% is now falling in the UK. That sounds encouraging, but then the reason is given 'because fewer people can afford it'. It just costs too much. So people are choosing to stay in their relationships instead. Some might argue that that's a good thing, that divorce shouldn't be super easy because relationships always hit difficult patches. And if there's an emphasis on staying married, people are encouraged to work at it. I think that's true in some cases. A world where people can too easily leave committed relationships may mean that it's not usual to work on your relationships and relationships do take work. On the other hand, people do need to be able to escape a bad relationship, don't they? So what's interesting here is the rise in the number of people who marry, divorce and then 'remarry' - marry a second time. Why would someone do that?
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A photograph of an old couple still very much in love. Discover important words like divorce and reconcile for better English conversations.
Celebrity couples - ‘Can’t live with you, can’t live without you’
If we look at celebrity couples for a minute, the most famous couple probably to do this, the actors Richard Burton and Elizabeth Taylor. They had a long romance and many other partners and marriages, but they married and divorced, then remarried and re-divorced. Make your mind up, folks! But apparently this phenomenon of the to-and-fro relationship is more common amongst famous people. The actor Ben Affleck and singer and actor Jennifer Lopez were engaged to be married in 2002, broke it off, were separate for nearly 20 years and then came back together in 2022. And they married in June of that year, only to divorce in August 2024. Sounds expensive! And recently, the golfer Rory McElroy called off his marriage and now it's back on again. Even Elon Musk married the actor and author Talulah Riley twice. It ended in divorce a second time, unfortunately. And further back in time, the artist Frida Kahlo and Diego Rivera. They married twice too. That's an interesting one. There was a 22-year age gap in that relationship.
So these well-known couples seem afflicted by that phenomenon - the 'can't live with you, but can't live without you'! That's where you're really attracted to someone, but you realise that the relationship you have with that person isn't healthy, possibly isn't good for either of you. There's often too much passion and not enough of the dynamics which give relationships 'staying power'. If something has 'staying power', it means it has 'the capability, the capacity to last'.
Can a person really change enough to make a failed marriage work again?
But amongst couples who are not rich and famous, apparently 10 to 15% of people who divorce get back together again. They don't necessarily marry, but they do reconcile. And many of the people who get divorced express regret. Regret here. R-E-G-R-E-T. That's when you wish you hadn't done something. Do you remember the song 'Je Ne Regrette Rien' by Édith Piaf? Perhaps you know that one?
Unconscious process at work in attraction and ‘chemistry’
Perhaps the problem is that if we're left to choose our romantic partners ourselves, a lot of it is what we call 'the chemistry'. By that, we mean 'the magic ingredients that make someone attractive to us'. Sometimes it's difficult to identify what the reasons are for that attraction. Often it doesn't make sense. As a psychotherapist, I find those reasons are often deeply buried in our psyche, in the psychological part of ourselves. We don't always understand them unless we look at them. And sometimes when we have a strong attraction to someone, we ignore the downsides. We turn a blind eye to the negatives. We are drawn into the relationship anyway. And if we marry someone, we need to learn to live with them. Sometimes the negatives can be negotiated, made gradually into positives. Through having conflict, through having argument, and then discussing it and agreeing a way forwards afterwards. But sometimes the negatives are just too great. And that's often when couples move towards separation and divorce. And sometimes divorce is the best idea for some couples. Sometimes that person is just not good for you.
Is love enough to make a marriage last, or does it take much more than that??
But it's also true to say that we need different things from our relationships across our lifespan, across the time that we're alive. It's also true that we mature and often have a greater understanding when we're older - of ourselves and other people. We often have more of what you call 'empathy'. E-M-P-A-T-H-Y. That means 'the ability to feel and understand what others experience'. We say 'we empathise' with people. And we learn greater patience when we're older. Our priorities might be different. We're less impulsive, more thoughtful. So it seems that a significant number of people look at the partner they divorced years ago. And they wonder, maybe things could be better with that person now. The old attraction is there, but we've matured as people. Maybe we could make it work this time.
How Understanding Global Population Decline Can Help You Learn English Faster
Esther Perel is a well-known couples therapist and writer. She talks about how the demand on marriage is much greater in modern times. We used to live much more in communities than we do in the modern Western world. So we weren't looking to our husband and wife to fulfil quite so many of our needs. There was a whole community and extended family to do that for us. And also, we live longer. The person that you chose to be in relationship with at 18 may not suit you when you're 58 and may not be the best person to be with when you're 88. Or maybe they've improved by then. Esther Perel talks about how unreasonable it sometimes is to expect one person to fulfil your needs across a 70-year period of potential relationship. And sometimes people go into marriage with unreasonably high expectation. 'Happy ever after' is a phrase in fairy tales in English. There's probably no such thing. As you grow older, you realise that relationships cannot be perfect, but they can still have more positive than negative in them.
Can a person really change enough to make a failed marriage work again?
An article in Psychology Today by Anne Gold Buscho, published June 2022, and called "Why Many Divorce Partners End Up Remarrying Each Other" backs all of this up. Here's a quote from that article so that you can practise with some English that's slightly more difficult. She says, 'If a problem has been resolved, such as lack of intimacy or financial stress, couples may reconnect, problems such as substance abuse, neglecting the marriage and over-focusing on career, and loneliness due to lack of attention from a partner. These are problems that can be resolved'. The author comments that this can happen through therapy, but it also happens with time. People develop greater thought and patience. And what's interesting too, in cultures where marriages tend to be arranged, meaning that the families help match people based on things beyond physical attraction, they look at shared values, financial backgrounds, religious beliefs, basically the things that matter in the long term. And usually, where culturally the expectation is that you'll marry someone that your family have had influence in choosing, there are usually mechanisms, ways in which young couples in this situation are helped and supported to gain these good relationship skills. Often these are what counts in the end for making a successful partnership or marriage. Of course, that's where arranged marriage works well. It can be a different story for some people.
Do you think divorce is too easy nowadays, or is it a necessary option for unhappy couples?
The couple in the Guardian newspaper article talk about how their children tease them. They got remarried on the same date as their original wedding day. So their children tease, 'Is this your fourth or your 36th wedding anniversary today?'! In the UK, the law around divorce changed in 2023. Couples now have 'No Fault' divorce. If someone is said to 'have fault', it means, 'Oh, the problem is theirs.' With 'No Fault' divorce, simply saying that your relationship has broken down - that's enough. Previously, the situation was that the couple had to agree who was 'at fault', who had 'done wrong and caused the end of the relationship'. As you can imagine, this caused enormous conflict. So perhaps 'No Fault' divorce also paves the way for more people to reconcile and marry a second time. That will be interesting to watch.
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Let us know what you think of this podcast and this subject. And don't forget to listen a number of times to really anchor those new words and phrases into your mind, into your brain. Remember also, you are unconsciously learning English grammar every time you listen.
Goodbye
Enough for now. Have a lovely day. Speak to you again soon. Goodbye.
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Links
- Will you marry me (again)?
- Elizabeth Taylor Was Still in Love With Ex Richard Burton
- Talulah Riley says she understands Elon
- Portrait of a complex marriage
- Why Partners End Up Remarrying
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